how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
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