I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
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