I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
Randomize
