At least make sure they are 18
Why
Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
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