Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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