Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
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