you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
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