So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
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