Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
Randomize
