WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
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