Your tits are I can't wait for
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
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