So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
Randomize
