THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Randomize
