This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
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