Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Randomize
