I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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