He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
im calling her cock vulture from now on
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
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