if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
Randomize
