she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize
