your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
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