Uh i was pretty wasted sat, so if i was weird it wasnt me. It was just vodka bein weird w my phone
Tonite tequila might call you
Be prepared
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
