im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
oh god the rape fog is back!
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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