yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
there is glitter all over my balls
Randomize
