She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
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