got in a fight at the bar because some dude thought i was being sarcastic when i told him "sweet mustache". it really was a sweet mustache
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
