Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Randomize
