I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Randomize
