come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Side note: I apologize for sex being the subject of every single one of my texts. That's what happens when you date an older man who constantly denies you sex on the basis of his ridiculous morals.
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