we made out on top of his cat.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
Let's paint friendship bongs
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
I've spent so much time on tinder lately I just tried to left swipe an instagram photo of my neighbor
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
His nipple licking is glorious
Randomize
