How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
Randomize
