I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
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