literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Randomize
