There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.
Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.
Last night I broke through a door, was hospitialized, arrested, and threw my shoe at a bouncer. This summer is gonna be fuckin sick.
Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
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