Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
Randomize
