I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
I need a hoe opinion
go on
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