How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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