Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
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