I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
Randomize
