I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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