I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
Randomize