Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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