You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
Randomize
