Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
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