i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Randomize
