They should really pass out barf bags in church
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
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