If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
made out with the bouncer to distract him from how illegitimate my fake id is.
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Randomize
