We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Randomize
