They should really pass out barf bags in church
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
You were trust falling into bushes
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Randomize
