Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Randomize
