when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
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